Thursday, May 29, 2008

Squirrels are from Hell

I have had some requests to tell "the squirrel story", so here it is. Warning: If you get creeped out (like me) by the sound and or sight of furry rodents - proceed with caution...

I used to think that squirrels were cute. In college, I used to feed them from my lunch as I ate on campus. I loved their tiny paws and their bushy tails. Now, I know the truth. Squirrels are satan's spawn. They are rats in thinly veiled disguises and I hate them.

There is, of course, a story behind this. It's a long one, so I will break it up into chapters for you.

Ch. 1 : The Runkels Hear a Friend

One lovely spring morning as Hal and I were headed to the office, we heard a strange noise coming from the hallway bathroom. It sounded remarkably like the sound of me typing these words - clicking, clacking, and scratching. We went in search of said noise and as we got closer to the sound, we also heard a high pitched squealing. I don't remember much else because I either fainted or ran outside - in either case, I found myself sitting on the front porch breathing deeply so I didn't throw up. Some....thing was stuck in the walls of my house. And here's the best part. Hal was headed out of town for 5 days.

to be continued...

1 comment:

Pieces of Us said...

So I just found your blog from the ScreamFree website (love it by the way..). I listen to Hal every Thursday morning on 97.1 ZHT-The Morning Zoo- in SLC, UT. You people are geniuses!
I was reading your profile and when you said "Squirrels are from Hell" I immediately knew we could be friends.
I searched through your archives and found this story. The same thing happened to my mom a few years back. Squirrels got in through her attic, stored walnuts in every box in her attic, ate through my diploma and who knows what else. They made it out of the attic into her house and ran a muck.
Needless to say she had to hire squirrel catchers to come get the measley buggers and patch up the holes in her attic.
So I reiterate..."SQUIRRELS ARE FROM HELL!!"

{p.s. sorry for my long comment on a post from last year...i think i am going to like this friendship..}